1. I get super excited when ever anyone wishes me Merry Christmas, instead of Happy Holidays. It's like this bubbly feeling that starts in my stomach and just spreads everywhere and I can't help but smile. It's almost here!
2. I get way more excited for Christmas Eve. It's SO much better than Christmas Day.
3. I have to wear a dress on New Years. I fucking HATE wearing dresses, they look like shit on me. Where the hell am I going to find a dress?
4. I can't wait for meatballs and brandy nut brie on Christmas Eve. Maybe throw in a martini or two....or ten.
5. My uncle pisses me off, he's such a douchebag.
6. One of my parents' friends' son just got engaged last week. He's getting married on July 20th, 2007. He's three months younger than me and has only been dating the girl for a year and a half...sometimes I wonder what is happening to us. Are we growing up? It pisses me off that people rush into something as important and sacred as marriage. It isn't a game anymore. It shouldn't be, "Well if it works, great, but if it doesn't there's always divorce." I think a lot of people just want the wedding to be honest, and then realize afterwards that it's FOREVER. Now a wedding is nice (who doesn't love dancing and alcohol and celebrating eternal love), but you have to be prepared for the consequences and can't give up if you hit a bump in the road. No wonder divorce rates are so high. I hate our society.
7. The Millie's Christmas Dinner Party was tonight. Someone hosts the party and cooks a full turkey dinner (gravy and all bitches!) and we all get dressed up and pretend we're 40 while drinking 9 bottles of wine between 10 of us. It rocks. Somehow the conversation always turns to our sex-capades, high school adventures and any embarassing story EVER.
8. I get extremely nervous about giving gifts when people won't tell me what they want. I'm a horrible gift giver, I second guess myself on EVERY purchase and am completely convinced that everybody is going to hate their gift. Gift receipts are my saviour.
9. I love wearing leggings with a skirt or dress because I can cross my legs while sitting down and not worry about flashing everyone.
10. I don't understand you at all sometimes. Why can't you try and see it from my point of view and try to understand? Why is there this double standard? Sometimes you hurt me more than you know.
11. Money is an extremely powerful motivator for me. I do not live my life around money, nor would I do something just because the money's good, but after working this past week I've realized that I value money and the lifestyle it can give me. I use it to feel secure and have a safety net. I am a money-grubbing whore.
12. My grandma is M-E-A-N. But as mad as she makes me all I can do is pity her. She isn't living anymore, she's just existing.
13. I JUST unpacked from coming home. I have WAY too much stuff. I need to do a purge of my closet and dresser, but for some reason I get emotionally attached to clothes and can't throw them away. I have problems.
14. I am going to Tiffany's tomorrow. Even though I don't wear jewelry (just earrings and the occasional ring or necklace) I LOOOOVE looking in good jewelry stores. It makes me wish I wore jewelry or had lots of sparkly things. Shanan and I are going to look at engagements rings and pick ours out....a girl can dream.
15. It's incredible how LOUD all of my high school friends are. It makes me feel like I'm not alone out there....because I'm 'naturally' loud. Yeah. Right.
Saturday, December 23, 2006
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Amusing Daily Moment
Shanti (English with Sri Lankan accent): "Well they say he got a promotion but I think he got fired. Wow, that woman's hair looks terrible."
(Woman with bad hair looks mildly embarassed.)
Rose (our boss): "Shanti what did you just say about our vice-president?"
Shanti: "Oh my god! You can understand me? Was I speaking in English again?"
Sadly this was the most amusing moment in my day.
(Woman with bad hair looks mildly embarassed.)
Rose (our boss): "Shanti what did you just say about our vice-president?"
Shanti: "Oh my god! You can understand me? Was I speaking in English again?"
Sadly this was the most amusing moment in my day.
Monday, December 18, 2006
The Word Of The Day
I am slowly becoming like my counting machine...dull, robotic and empty-headed...with the occasional screw-up. At work my mind just drifts into nothingness...my brain turns to mush. I often find myself planning my lunch break that is two days away just so that I have something to look forward too...pathetic I know.
Today, for an hour and a half I contemplated why a swear word is a swear word. Why do people think 'fuck' is a bad word and not...'apple' for instance. There is no reason why one word is worse than another. I bet that somewhere along the line somebody just decided to bestow the honour of 'fuck' being a bad word for shigiggles (shits and giggles) and see how everybody reacted. Worked out quite well don't you think. You might say that 'fuck' is a bad word because it sounds vulgar...but this is not so. We were raised to think that it is not a proper word for a proper young lady and therefore it is conditioned to sound vulgar to us. One day I am going to decide that a common word like "pen", "chair", "bag" or "glass" is a bad word...what would people do then. Why do we have 'acceptable' alternatives for the word 'fuck'? Sometimes I just don't understand.
Somebody save me from myself. The fluroescent lights and counting machines (which will soon be my soulmates...as I am turning into one of them) are frying my brain.
Do other people have thoughts like this? Or should I just give up hope now.
Today, for an hour and a half I contemplated why a swear word is a swear word. Why do people think 'fuck' is a bad word and not...'apple' for instance. There is no reason why one word is worse than another. I bet that somewhere along the line somebody just decided to bestow the honour of 'fuck' being a bad word for shigiggles (shits and giggles) and see how everybody reacted. Worked out quite well don't you think. You might say that 'fuck' is a bad word because it sounds vulgar...but this is not so. We were raised to think that it is not a proper word for a proper young lady and therefore it is conditioned to sound vulgar to us. One day I am going to decide that a common word like "pen", "chair", "bag" or "glass" is a bad word...what would people do then. Why do we have 'acceptable' alternatives for the word 'fuck'? Sometimes I just don't understand.
Somebody save me from myself. The fluroescent lights and counting machines (which will soon be my soulmates...as I am turning into one of them) are frying my brain.
Do other people have thoughts like this? Or should I just give up hope now.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Do I Know You? Because You May Know Me...
I always forget my positive attributes.
I don't have any problem noticing and remembering anything negative about myself. But I always find myself surprised whenever somebody pays me a compliment or says something nice about me. Always. Now that I think about it, I find it rather sad. I should be able to think of at least four things about myself that I like. And I can't.
The summer between grades 11 and 12 I went on a month-long trip to England. I did my OAC English credit over there and basically had one of the best times of my life. My teacher over there was inspired to write us (her Millie's class) good-bye notes after I hugged her at dinner on the last night. In it she wrote that she learned from me. I just found this note this afternoon, and I found it amazing that anybody could learn ANYTHING from me. What she wrote touched me and I was startled to realize that they may be true. I need to stop surprising myself.
The things she learned from me:
1) You can never have too many jean skirts. (A rule which I still live by.)
2) Let all the joy inside you bubble out and infect everyone around you. (Do I really infect people?)
3) Smile frequently to show people how beautiful you are. (Didn't have orthodontics since grade two for nothing!)
4) Crying in public is perfectly O.K. (*ahem* yes I may still cry frequently...and in public.)
Why do I need people who are almost strangers to point out good qualities in myself?
I don't have any problem noticing and remembering anything negative about myself. But I always find myself surprised whenever somebody pays me a compliment or says something nice about me. Always. Now that I think about it, I find it rather sad. I should be able to think of at least four things about myself that I like. And I can't.
The summer between grades 11 and 12 I went on a month-long trip to England. I did my OAC English credit over there and basically had one of the best times of my life. My teacher over there was inspired to write us (her Millie's class) good-bye notes after I hugged her at dinner on the last night. In it she wrote that she learned from me. I just found this note this afternoon, and I found it amazing that anybody could learn ANYTHING from me. What she wrote touched me and I was startled to realize that they may be true. I need to stop surprising myself.
The things she learned from me:
1) You can never have too many jean skirts. (A rule which I still live by.)
2) Let all the joy inside you bubble out and infect everyone around you. (Do I really infect people?)
3) Smile frequently to show people how beautiful you are. (Didn't have orthodontics since grade two for nothing!)
4) Crying in public is perfectly O.K. (*ahem* yes I may still cry frequently...and in public.)
Why do I need people who are almost strangers to point out good qualities in myself?
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
A Healthy Level of Insanity
Well, it's exam time again, and for all those on the brink of insanity here are some ideas to just push you over the edge.
20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity:
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses On And Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries With That.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favours"
7. Finish All Your Sentences With "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. Don't Use Any Punctuation.
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water Whenever You Go Out To Eat...With A Serious Face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-Through Order Is "To Go."
12. Sing Along...At The Opera
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM Scream, "I Won!, I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo Start Running Towards The Parking Lot Yelling, "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. When reading a fortune cookie end it with "in bed".
As you can see, I've already obtained that level of insanity you are all aspiring to reach. I wish you the best of luck.
20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity:
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses On And Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries With That.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favours"
7. Finish All Your Sentences With "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. Don't Use Any Punctuation.
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water Whenever You Go Out To Eat...With A Serious Face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-Through Order Is "To Go."
12. Sing Along...At The Opera
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM Scream, "I Won!, I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo Start Running Towards The Parking Lot Yelling, "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. When reading a fortune cookie end it with "in bed".
As you can see, I've already obtained that level of insanity you are all aspiring to reach. I wish you the best of luck.
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